Have you ever had a moment, sitting with a group of people, when all of a sudden,
something comes into your head, an idea, a creative thought, and you just say
it out loud? Maybe the idea isn’t fully formed… after all – it’s just come to
you. It’s a little rough, but full of colour and originality. Overcome by a
sense of excitement and joy, you decide to trust your audience. You share it.
What happens next can change the way you show up for a lifetime.
People have a choice when they witness someone sharing something new…
People may decide to laugh and mock you, and feeling ashamed, you may blush and retreat to
the shadows and never share anything again, or…
People shoot your idea down and say why it won’t work/why it’s a bad idea/how it’s too
expensive/too complicated/too simple/too challenging… These statements usually
start with ‘Yes, but…’ In this scenario, you might feel stupid, you might beat
yourself up for saying anything in the first place ("If only I’d have kept my
big mouth shut!"). You may feel small and judged, and you may conclude that
sharing ideas isn’t safe.
This negative reaction to new ideas is the equivalent of a kid that stamps on someone else’s sand
castle. For the sake of one expression of power, you’re destroying something
and potentially deterring someone from trying again. I wonder how many amazing
ideas remain locked inside people’s heads for fear of rejection?
Sharing ideas in the moment can be a risky business. Whether it’s with our friends or
family, at school, or in the workplace, these experiences can make a huge
impact and leave a lasting impression on us.
I liken it to releasing a pheasant. A pheasant is bright and colourful and when stirred
it takes flight and makes itself an easy target, like that new idea sent flying
out into the ether. In this sense, maybe pheasants are naïve, they fly into
danger, but I also know that in a world full of cynicism and negativity, naivety
can act as a refreshing antidote. As a coach, I know the power of a naïve question
asked at the right time. Such a question can cut to the heart of the matter.
There can be beauty, honesty and liberation in this approach.
Sharing an idea is an act of faith. You share and you hope. You hope you will be listened
to. You hope you will be respected. You hope you and your ideas will be acknowledged
and accepted.
In a world desperately in need of creative problem solving, new ways of doing things
and innovation, it’s time to recognise that the environments we create in our
homes, schools and workplaces really matter.
In coaching we contract with our coachees. We talk about how we want to work together
and create a safe space which allows for creativity and resourcefulness. In this
space incredible things can happen. It’s a space rich with possibility. I often
think how much better meetings would be if we talked up-front about how we want
to work together and agree how we can support one another to feel safe, be
ourselves, and offer up our best thinking. To co-create an environment that is
kind, respectful, exciting and nurturing.
Imagine what a difference it would make if…
People smiled when you shared an idea, and asked you to say more, wouldn’t that make
you feel respected and listened to?
What if people reacted enthusiastically and built on your idea by saying ‘Yes, and…’ wouldn’t
that make you feel validated and included? Wouldn’t that make you feel like you
were part of a welcoming, creative community?
So, encourage those pheasants, particularly if you’re in a position of power.
Appreciate the trust shown in their release, the bravery, their colour and
originality. Don’t shoot them down. Keep them alive, and who knows, one day, one
of those pheasants might lead you to the best discovery of your life.
Written by Paul Williamson, Executive Coach and author of 'Pheasant Dreams'
